


What Could've Been

by WolfMeister



Series: Supernatural One-Shots [6]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Episode: s11e23 Alpha and Omega, Fix-It of Sorts, M/M, Season/Series 11 Spoilers, how i thought it should've gone
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-31
Updated: 2016-05-31
Packaged: 2018-07-11 10:01:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 762
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7043671
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WolfMeister/pseuds/WolfMeister
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>so pretty much this is what i legit thought was going to happen during the season finale as i watched it. Most of the lines are the same, little changes here and there. An extra scene. no british lady</p>
            </blockquote>





	What Could've Been

They got in the car, and drove. Nowhere specific in mind, just a relaxing drive. Dean needed to talk to Castiel anyway, and this was a good way to do so. Just the two of them on the road like the world isn’t about to end and God isn’t about to die. They don’t talk for a while, just enjoy each other’s company.

The silence allows Dean to focus on the thoughts that have been swimming through his mind ever since he learned that Castiel was possessed by Lucifer. The silence makes him focus on his feelings. Specifically, the feelings he has for the angel sitting next to him. Dean looks over at Cas, he’s just staring straight ahead.

“How’re you doing? You good?” Dean asks. “I mean, with the whole Lucifer thing.” Castiel huffs.

“I was just,” the angel shakes his head, “so stupid.”

“No, no, no,” Dean mutters, also shaking his head. “It wasn’t stupid, you were right to let Lucifer ride shotgun, and me and Sam wouldn’t have done that.” Dean glances over at Castiel to find him staring back. 

“Well it didn’t work,” Cas states. He has a point.

“Yeah, but it was our best shot,” Dean pauses. “And you stepped up. But don’t do that again.”

“I was just trying to help.”

“Yeah, and you do help. Cas, you know I, sometimes me and Sam have so much going on and we forget about everyone else.” Cas smiles.

“Well you do live exciting lives!” Dean lets out a breath of laughter.

“Yeah, that’s one word for it.” A few seconds pass in silence. Maybe Dean should mention it. He looks over at the angel. “But you’re always there, you know?” The hunter can’t stop the words from coming out of his mouth. Dean pays attention to the road again. “You’re the best friend we’ve ever had.” Dean looks back over at Castiel. “Maybe even more than that to me,” he adds on quietly, reaching over and taking the angel’s hand in his. Cas looks over at him, mouth slightly parted in surprise, and it appears as though he might cry.

“Dean…” Castiel breathes out, squeezing the hunter’s calloused hand. Dean’s phone rings and he reluctantly releases the angel’s hand to answer the call from Sam.

~

Castiel hated that Dean had to be the bomb. He would’ve gladly taken his place, but he couldn’t get close to Amara. Castiel hated watching Dean absorb the souls of the dead, he hated how Dean had willingly agreed. Castiel hated how selfish he was being.

He couldn’t think about anything other than that this will be the last time he sees Dean when they’re at the graveyard. He can’t help it that tears are threatening to spill out of his eyes. He can’t help it that he wants Dean to stay.

Dean talked to Chuck first, before turning to the angel, whispering his name. Castiel nearly lost it right then and there. He swiftly pulled Dean into a long hug, hearing Dean’s voice but not comprehending the words. Castiel blinks back the tears threatening to fall, and he reluctantly let’s go of Dean.

“I could go with you,” he hears himself say. Dean shakes his head.

“No, no no, I gotta do this alone. Listen, if, uh, _when_ this works, Sam, he’s gonna be a mess, so look out for him, okay? Make sure he’s not doing anything stupid.”

“Of course,” Cas replies, feeling his heart shattering.

“Thank you, for everything,” Dean states, placing his hand on the angel’s shoulder. Cas remembers when he said the same thing to Dean in Purgatory. So when Dean’s about to turn around, talk to the whole group, Castiel can’t help but stop him.

“Dean, I…” Cas trails off, finding himself unable to say what he wants to, even after all these years loving the man before him. Castiel breaks eye contact for a moment, looking at the ground and rapidly blinking, hoping the tears will just disappear. Dean gently tilts his head up, closing the distance between then and gently sealing their lips together. Castiel closes his eyes, the tears finally spilling over.

And maybe that’s why, even though the strength of the sun returned, Castiel couldn’t stop his chest from aching, he couldn’t fill the emptiness in his heart. And maybe that’s why, once he was back at the bunker with Sam, he sat in Dean’s room for hours, not shedding any tears, yet hurting all the same.

Maybe that’s why he couldn’t stop crying when Dean came back and held him close.


End file.
